What I Have Come To Realize

Have not written in a while...so I thought it was about time!

So basically I have been prayin and thinkin alot lately. I think about what an emotional roller coaster I have been on throughtout my life. I was talkin to a friend at work telling him all that I have been through and He said "I don't get how you can be the nicest, sweetest girl considering all you have been through" Which made me happy that he things I am so kind. I told him I just put a smile on and to look at me you couldn't tell I have been through alot. There is no point in moping around dwellin on things of the past the only thing that matters is the present, and the future. So Just put a smile on and to the world its as if you have been through nothing. So Just thought I would share that talk with that kid,

Also, I have realized that when it comes to relationships I have been pretty confused. I know I should not be lookin for someone to be with because God will put that person in my life when the time comes. But before I was prayin about it and all and when I find myself struggling and lookin for someone when I think about it I at that point am only looking for Mr. Right Now, not Mr. Right. I realize I will not find Mr. Right until the "RIGHT" time comes. When God thinks I myself am fully prepared for it, and when he thinks my Mr. Right is fully prepared as well.I have learned I just got to throw my hands down and put it all in Gods hands. I am on and off with it I will be doin good but then I struggle so I really do need to hands down give it to God! I have been hurt by so many boys its beginning to really get annoying and I always start to think that there probably is not a decent nice guy out there and it hurts but hey its probably Gods way of slappin me in the face telling me to just leave it to him and he will provide a decent guy for me. Waiting is the hard part....but I know God will greatly reward me for it. You have to go through some of the wrong ones before you meet the right one, and trust me I have had my share of wrong ones. I think of it this way...If I don't wait if I did date someone I would be settling for second best and why settle for second best when GOD has the best for me...I was talkin to a friend and she explained it to me like that, and I realized how true that was. I also know I have to be okay with myself and love myself or I will never be able to love someone else. So I strongly believe that the waiting part helps a big part in that. It sort of forces me to go out and do things on my own.....which makes me okay with myself which is good. The time will come for me to meet that guy, its just on Gods time Not Mine. So I just take the time to go do things on my own, and with close friends, and with family. So yeah....those of you I have sought out for advice thanks...and just continue to keep me in your prayers!
God Bless...Be Moved

(sorry this blog was kinda jumbled up just had to say it all haha)